You can pick your friends you can’t pick your family and you certainly can’t pick your neighbors. Sometimes the people you live next to are just plain old weird. There’s very little control that you have over it because you never know who you’re going to move in next to. Maybe it’s the guy with the weird dog or kids who keep trying to get into your backyard. Maybe it’s the people who want their Christmas lights up all year round even in July. Maybe it’s the woman with five-hundred cats. Maybe it’s a couple who can’t stop fighting and should get a divorce. Maybe the man in the house from the movie Up lives next to you. Maybe they have a really weird front lawn. Maybe you neighbor casually owns a gun or is a drug dealer. Maybe they’re passive aggressive and paint things like “LOOK BOB I’VE PAINTED MY FENCE” with a smiley face in order to prove a point. Whatever it is we all have stories about our weirdo neighbors. You might even be a weirdo neighbor yourself! No shame in that. Below you’ll find a whole bunch of photos which shape up to be a great collection of the weirdest neighbors ever:

Well that’s a creepy thing to have in your yard. It’s probably supposed to be a scare crow but for the record it’s a really strange scare crow. It sort of looks like a zombie so it also succeeds in scaring neighbors. Perhaps that is what the owner of the scare crow is going for. Do you think that crows are also scared of zombies and they have their own crow version of The Walking Dead? The creepiest part of this photo is the man lurking/standing in the corner watching the scare crow. Is he supposed to be the man that scares scare crows? Or neighbors? Maybe the creepy zombie scare crow is supposed to be a representation of him? Whatever it is it’s super creepy and we’re pretty sure you don’t want to live next to that guy or his scare crow.

Could you imagine opening your door every morning to this? Your neighbor’s son starting at you eating a banana? The outfit doesn’t really help him at all. He’s got red mittens a yellow jacket a blue and white striped car hat and blue sunglasses. That makes quite a combination. He is ready for trouble or to offer his best Blue Steel look alla Derek Zoolander. This little kid looks like a super chique Fire Fighter-Car Model-California Bro hybrid. The banana is also a nice touch. Well if you’re going to have a weird neighbor I suppose it might as well be this cute kid.

I’ve heard of people carrying around small dogs in carriages but birds?! Here we have birds all over this magical bird couple. We get to see the fantastic bird backpack being modeled here. This lovely grey parrot in a cage rides on this lady’s back while a smaller green bird sits on this old man’s walker. On top of the walker we see a beautiful trained red Macaw that sits out in the open. It must be fun to be surrounded by this much chatter during the day for the two people in this photo but how about their neighbors? What about you would you want to listen to bird chatter all day long? It probably depends on what the bird would be saying. What if one of the birds just swore all day?

Ah yes. The communal microwave. There’s nothing like a good old microwave that your neighbor leaves on a wooden post for you. Everyone could stand to learn a thing or too from this neighborhood here. Wait a second…is that even plugged in?! Maybe there’s a secret outlet in the ground or something. Maybe this microwave is meant so that the birds and squirrel could microwave their food? Did your really old neighbor leave it there as a favor because they forgot it needed electricity? Perhaps this is a gift from the wood nymphs. Or maybe someone thinks this is how you dispose of your garbage? Overall this image is very unclear but at least you have a free microwave if you want one!

The neighbors have tried to do everything to get their cat to quit smoking. They’ve put him on the patch they’ve had him go cold turkey. Nothing has worked since the cat always figures out a way for him to find a smoke so now they’re looking for community outreach. They’ve left this sign so that you can help them in their quest to get their cat to stop smoking. Wait do we think the cat really smokes or he just ingests the cigarettes resulting in a really big vet bill? Or is this a passive aggressive situation and they really just don’t want cigarette butts on their property? Either way stop throwing your cigarette butts on their lawn and help them save their cat.

“Hey! My name’s Tom and I’m the new Raccoon in the neighborhood! I’ve chosen your roof to live on and I just wanted to wave hello. Maybe later on I can drop off a basket of baked goods for you to enjoy. I’m a really good neighbor and I only will poop on my new property sometimes. I’ll try not to bare my teeth at you but I have to sometimes because I’m not really a morning person. I’m nocturnal-I only work at night and sleep through the whole day. Normally you won’t have to worry about bothering me. Now I just want to talk to you really quickly about the fact that your kid keeps throwing balls up on the roof and they keep disturbing my beauty rest. It should only take a few attempted bites at your wrist to clear all that up.”

In Medieval times when you wanted to communicate unhappiness with your neighbors you would shoot an arrow into something on their property. A person some cattle a part of the castle. Here we see that this method has been adopted by a modern day neighbor. This arrow represents some sort of dispute within the neighborhood and clearly the person did not want to march right up to the door and get to the bottom of it. This is one strategy that you can definitely use for settling things around your hood but probably a better method would be marching directly up to your neighbor’s door and telling them what your beef is.

These are some super weird neighbors. Apparently this house is owned by a nudist doll colony. It’s great that these dolls have found their place in the world and all but it’s a little odd that these nudist dolls are also choosing to walk on stilts. It must be because that’s the only way that they can actually see their garden in order to carry out their daily chores. Well there’s nothing like coming home to a bunch of naked dolls. The baby doll is really weird though. I feel like the Barbies should’ve waited until the baby doll was old enough to make their own choice about nudity you know?

If Game of Thrones were a show featuring actual ten year old boys then this is what a shot of the battle scenes would actually look like. Maybe these kids are just trying to see what’s inside the spiked window since it could be a prisoner or a dragon. Other thoughts are that the balls are kept on spikes in order to deter the children from playing in the neighborhood. Here is where all the balls have met their death and let this be a lesson to anyone who attempts to throw one at this window. Beware.

We can see you showering! We like it when you watch! These are just two things your neighbors want to let you know albeit a little passive aggressively using their WiFi. It probably would’ve been a little awkward to bring it up directly to your face or directly at a neighborhood block party or meeting. It’s better that these people let everyone know what their into and what’s going on in the neighborhood through their Network it’s a lot easier than actual confrontation. Plus anyone who wants to watch now can watch and anyone who wants to not be seen showering can just cover up and make sure they’re not seen. Win win for everyone!

This was a very clever neighborhood police trap. The police will never be able to tell that it’s a trap for them. It clearly says “Free Donuts” with an arrow and not “Police Trap” so it’s actually very clever. There are even donuts planted underneath the box so the trap is not a lie. Do you think this was planted by a bunch of criminals or Bugs Bunny? Whatever it is these weird neighbors are definitely going to catch some cops with this trap sometimes soon. Based on this photo probably in a couple of seconds.

I guess this is one of the kinds of neighbors who’s really good at following directions. Obviously this person has completed what was expected of them since he wrote “Look Bob I’ve painted my fence!” with a smiley face. He did it. He painted the fence Bob. Now will you finally get off his case? Now I’m kind of wondering if this is actually an art performance piece or if someone was really ballsy enough to do this to their neighbor. The next time someone asks you to do something keep this weird neighbor’s fence in mind! You just have to do exactly what your neighbor says kind-of it doesn’t really matter how you execute it.

Above we have a minimalist neighbor and below we have a crazy fun garden party green thumb kind of neighbor. It’s interesting how two people can live on top of one another and be so totally completely different. Below we see the décor makes up a universe and above we see it’s just a few chairs. Either way it probably is really weird to look at both of these from down on the street.

Well I guess this is what happens when you go through a bad break up or divorce. Eventually you’re forced to pay child support on your dog or cat and are going to have to leave it on your significant other’s door step. At least if you leave the kitty litter there and you label it the cat will know you care. It’ll also grow up knowing that you left it child support so it should feel loved and not grow up as an insecure cat with parent-issues. This must look really weird to any neighbors walking by their porch though not going to lie.

Yohoho and a bottle of rum this is a really great terrace set up for any pirates out there who are looking into home décor options. I saw this featured on a Pirate home decorating section of Pintrest posts earlier this month and it’s a very very impressive set up. You can buy the expensive pirate furniture or you can use the DIY options. There’s also a new Ikea and Crate and Barrell pirate section so that should have you set for awhile. Either way all of your neighbors are going to know that you’re a pirate. Isn’t it so great that society is finally open enough to accept pirates?

If you plant a dinosaur seed dinosaurs will grow from the ground! Did you know that? Also it is not at all an eye sore to look at all of these plastic dinosaurs and I mean that with the utmost of sarcasm. If you’re going to put ugly plastic dinosaurs all over your yard this is probably the worst kind that you could pick. The color is all…how should we put this? Creepy and orange? The point is obviously to tell Carol that she is not a dinosaur and wish her a happy birthday. Unless Carol is an eight year old who’s obsessed with fossils it’s a very strange way to greet a grown person on their birthday but we’ll take it.  

It’s really important everyone see her age progression on her lawn. Do you think she was happy about it? Some people like birthdays some people don’t so hopefully the people who did this weren’t too presumptuous and checked in with her before hand. Everyone in this neighborhood most definitely had to drive past this on their morning and evening commute for however long this was left up so think about that the next time you’re weirded out by your neighbor or think they’re giving you too much information about themselves.

This is one of those lovely decorated trees clearly in one of those places where they don’t have pine trees because it’s too warm. Luckily some neighbors always have a solution when it comes to the holiday season. Here we see an improvised Christmas carrot. It might be a palm tree. Not too sure but regardless it’s festive and prettily decorated! Thanks neighbors!

Here we have the first back to the future car prototype car hooked up to a generator. It might be a time machine and it might take you back in time but it might also explode. It could just be a bomb strapped to a car. We’re not too sure. Probably steer clear of your neighbor if this is them just as an FYI.

Three notes. That’s what this neighbor thought would be appropriate in order to tell the world not to their cats out. It definitely gets the point across for visitors and also provides a lot of specific information for them about the cats that occupy the apartment. We have “Do not let cats out” with a bunch of underlines “DO NOT LET THE CATS OUT THEY WILL TRY TO RUN OUT WHEN YOU OPEN the DOOR” (note the select capitalization) and “The big one will act like he isn’t interested in going outside and then he WILL run out!!” Wouldn’t it be great if all people left information like this on their doors about their children and animals? No mail men would ever be bitten by dogs ever again while delivering mail! No kids would attack you with their sticky hands if you didn’t want them to because there would be a note about it. That big cat is really smart though. He sounds like he could be a secret agent.

All people with pickup trucks store weird things in the back of their car this is just a well known fact. Here we see this beautiful red pick up truck with what looks like an entire tree inside of it. This is perfect because this truck has a backyard no matter where it goes. Additionally if the neighbor’s front yard is not up to par no problem! They can just park this red truck in front of their house and voila! Instant front yard! This is the perfect lazy man’s hack to having a nice front yard. Park your car in front have a tree in the back and boom. You’ll have the nicest fake portable front yard in the world! 

Probably if your neighbor has this in their front or back yard your neighbor is Elsa from the movie Frozen. Eventually she must have wanted to move away from her kingdom and find a nice little cottage she could recreate her kingdom of isolation in. You can’t help it if your neighborhood was the place to do it can you? Being a queen is really high stress and sometimes she just needs to let it go. Hopefully Elsa relocated to an already cold place and isn’t totally bothering neighbors in places like Los Angeles Las Vegas or Dubai. Snow isn’t fun in the dessert and also hearing Let it Go while you’re trying to relax and take some sun on the beach is probably exhausting for all of her neighbors.

At least when you walk up to this door you know where you stand. The person who owns this doormat is just being brutally honest about how they feel about everyone who comes over. What’s nice is that you know this person’s personality before you have ever even walked into their house. If you think it’s rude and not funny you probably shouldn’t be friends with them. If you think it’s a badass move to have this in front of their door then you’re probably in the right place. Sarcastic neighbors unite!

Well they’ve done it now. Someone called the police on this neighbor’s lawn and now they’re going to have to deal with the consequences of this flamingo army! How do flamingos fight anyway? Are they a violent creature? Will they stab you with their beak and one leg or will they simply look pink and ridiculous in your neighborhood infuriating someone who is likely to call the cops on them. Do you think if the police came to this lawn they’d be able to take it seriously? What do you think this person is going to retaliate with? Perhaps a lawn filled with plastic penguins? Plastic gnomes? Plastic dinosaurs? That’d be a neighbor fight for the books ladies and gentlemen.

Either this person lives right next to Area 51 or some very nice aliens have moved into a suburban neighborhood! They were very nice and parked their space ship right in their driveway. It goes very nice with the tree next to their house. Hopefully this is a neighborhood that isn’t racist against aliens and these guys will have a newfound home in the neighborhood! Wouldn’t you want your neighbors to be these aliens? Think of all the cool space customs you could learn! Think about all of the amazing facts they probably know about the universe! You’d be ahead of everyone who didn’t know any aliens that’s for sure!

Ah yes here we have the neighborhood skeleton party. It happens every year on The Fourth of July. No not Halloween that would be too cliché. These are neighborhood skeletons who like to party even in the middle of summer. They have a really great BBQ going every year and everything. Skeleton parties are a year round thing. Skeletons are also a great house decoration in case you were wondering since they look extremely fashionable in every single holiday décor and can be dressed up in people clothes. This makes a very entertainingly decorated house indeed. Hot neighbor tip: get some skeletons to get a party started at any time of year.

Oh .that’s nice of them. Except for the fact that this note is anonymous and now you’re going to spend a lot of time wondering who has seen you naked. Also writing “a group of your neighbors” is kind of strange. Who can see everything? Is it one couple? Is it one family? Or is it for real an assembled group? If it’s the last one that’s pretty strange. A little invasive don’t you think? Shouldn’t they have just gotten the neighbor closes to them to tell them privately? Also-who exactly installed this door? What company messed this up? That is an insanely creepy istake and I for one am going to be having a hard time ever having a frosty glass door installed on anything in my house. So thank you very much weird neighbors!

The title of this image would probably do well as a children’s book. No big deal but…this neighbor just has a pink elephant. It’s wearing glasses and holding a martini glass. It’s a drunk pink elephant drinking a martini. So basically this neighbor wins and puts all other lawns to shame. There also seems to be an assembled flamingo army around the elephant which makes this drunk pink elephant even better. Wow this neighbor really likes pink. Also do you think this is the escalation of the photo of the guy with the flamingo army? That this elephant is maybe the ultimate retaliation for calling the cops on the neighbor’s lawn? Either way I know I’d love to party with this elephant and this neighbor. If this is the front yard what kind of animals do you think they have in their back yard? Pink dinosaurs? Pink crocodiles? Pink cows? A pink giraffe? An entire pink circus or zoo? The list of possibilities goes on and on.

Well either a clown lives here or a giant who likes to make balloon animals. I’ll leave that up to your imagination. There’s nothing like waking up in the morning making yourself a nice hot cup of coffee and then looking out your window only to be greeted by a massive see through balloon. It’s a little worrisome-do you think the balloon shattered the window because it blew up so big or do you think the person opened the window? Is this a balloon that is going to make a giant wiener dog? Is this made by a giant clown for a giant’s birthday party? Maybe this balloon is for a giant child-actually yeah. That’s the most logical explanation in this scenario.

This is a clear message for anyone who dares to park in front of this garage. Obviously these neighbors have had issues with this in the past which is why they’ve left such a clear message. This is an extremely polite sign and I applaud them for writing “please” and “Thank you” for the amounts of “never”s and “ever”s they had to write. If you’re their neighbor and you park here you’re probably stupid just letting you know. How many times do you think someone was dumb enough to make this mistake to the point where they had to make this sign? Do you think maybe their teenagers accidentally do it? Good neighbor tip: Don’t park in front of people’s garages.

It just feels like this tree is staring into your soul. It just has a knack for being unsettling and making you feel uncomfortable. It’s unclear why exactly this buddy is in the back yard and why anyone would buy it for decoration or for children to play on. It is unclear on what the function of this plastic tree is. Hopefully it was bought for this play set and didn’t totally sprout from the ground. Then we’d be dealing with a whole new alien/tree race and this one happens to be really hard to look at.

We’ve finally cracked the case. Wolverine lives in the suburbs. I always thought he lived in the city but it makes sense that he would live here. Fighting crime can be really stressful and when he gets home he just want’s to take his shoes off and shine his claws. This set up gives him some quality time to himself without all of the other mutants. He can finally focus on himself and meditate while he’s not at work. Imagine if you were Wolverine’s neighbor! He would be a great person to have around the neighborhood. You would have the best time. You’d always have someone there to scratch your back help you rake and open cans! Such a cool neighbor.

No what exactly? No Christmas? No neighbors? No entry? This person has just put a Post-it that says “NO” on their front door. It’s not exactly the most welcoming thing and it’s pretty vague. Not to sure what they were going for but it’s safe to say that this house has a negative vibe. So welcome to the neighborhood with these weird “no” neighbors I guess? It’s hard to figure out what exactly this fun neighbor is rejecting. No people knocking on the door? No Jehovas witnesses? There’s no one home? No pets allowed? No people allowed? Since there’s a wreath maybe no holidays? No wreaths? Well we said this post would be about weird neighbors and this home crafted decoration definitely takes the cake on the unfriendliness scale. They could learn something from that lady who left three notes on the door about her cats-now that was specific!